You’re going to have to blow this one up to read that tiny text.

Mi amiga Sara and I were trying to figure out why I feel so out of it, and she suggested that it might have been due to the moon. ¬†Which led me to figure out my true nature…the nature of THE WERETOPUS.
You better hide all your shrimp scampi and scallops with paella when the moon is full…NO SEAFOOD LEFTOVERS SHALL BE SAFE!
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
–m